We tend to hold grudges when we believe that we have been wronged by someone. Those grudges manifest themselves in many ways. We sometimes stop talking to the person and even the people close to the person. We badmouth the person in front of others. We may even ask our family and friends to choose sides.

Our scriptures not only teach how to reach God but they also help us manage our behavior and attitudes in our relationships. Here are some examples from the Ramayan that we can learn from.

When Mother Kaushalya found out that Shri Ram was being exiled for fourteen years and that Kaikeyi was the reason behind it, she held no grudge against Kaikeyi and continued to treat her lovingly. When Bharat returned to Ayodhya, he was distraught and blamed his mother Kaikeyi, but Kaushalya held no grudge. Instead, she wiped away Bharat's tears and comforted him. She embraced him lovingly over and over again.
When Mother Sumitra found out that her son Lakshman had decided to accompany Shri Ram and Seeta to the forest, her advice to him was, "Regard Seeta as your mother and Ram as your father. Accompany them to the forest and serve them faithfully."

When the three mothers, Bharat and Shatrughna came to meet Shri Ram in the forest, he first greeted Kaikeyi and touched her feet before greeting his own mother Kaushalya. Then he comforted her when she blamed herself for the sequence of events. Seeta treated not only Kaushalya and Sumitra but also Kaikeyi with great respect without holding a grudge.
We must learn from the great ones and hold no grudges.


Didi Ji